The holidays are supposed to be a time full of joy, parties and gatherings with friends and families. But the holidays can be a difficult time for many persons dealing with grief, loneliness, illnesses, economic concerns, separation from family members, and relationship issues. How do you handle so many movies, ads, and social media broadcasting family and togetherness if you’ve lost a loved one or you feel all alone? What do you do with so many messages about everything being “merry and bright” when, in most places, it is quite literally cold and dark? The truth is that, for many, this can be the most difficult time of the year. In 2014, NAMI found that 64% of people with mental illness say the holidays make their conditions worse. So, if you find yourself feeling anxious for the holidays, you are not alone.

Here are a few steps you can take to prioritize your mental health during this season:

• Accept Your Feelings – The holidays can bring up a range of emotions for people. Try your best to acknowledge and accept your emotions rather than place judgment on them. It’s okay and normal to feel happiness, sadness, grief, or multiple feelings at once. Give yourself compassion and allow yourself to sit with whatever you’re feeling.
• Maintain Healthy Habits – For many people, the holidays lead to a disruption in their routine. But maintaining healthy habits like getting enough sleep and exercising are critical to keeping your mental health on track.
• Set Boundaries – People like to be generous during the holidays with their money and their time.  If hosting an event or buying an expensive gift is too stressful, it’s okay to say no. It’s also okay to limit the time you spend with family with whom you may have a complicated dynamic.
• Make Time to Connect – Connection and meaning are critical to our mental health. Make time for your important relationships and connect with yourself through self-care. You can even connect with loved ones who are no longer with you through a family tradition or a personal remembrance ritual. We would all do better to let go of the image of the “perfect” holiday and focus on accepting ourselves and our loved ones without judging, criticizing or advising.

For those who need a grace-filled hour of reflection, prayer, and inspirational readings, please come to the Longest Night Service, Wednesday, December 21st at 7:00 at Saint Johns.